If you were absolutely honest with yourself, your entire search for a more spiritual existence is driven by the desire to escape suffering. There will come a point in your journey where everything you have read suddenly sinks in and you will know that suffering is nothing more than an unconscious attachment to a specific outcome. We spend our lives fighting the universe, trying to force the outcome we want. And we suffer when things don’t go our way. You will need to hear this many times on your journey so hear it is again, stop focusing on the outcome. Focus on this moment! Focus on the one thing you can control, the way you are feeling!

If I had to put it into 5 easy steps they would be as follows:

1) What was the outcome you so wanted ? Get that clear in your mind

2) How did you expect to feel when you got ‘there ‘ ?

3) Visualise yourself in that expected outcome and start feeling the moment

4) In this moment actively and consciously OWN your feelings. Start to do, say and think whatever you need for you to be able to maintain those feeling

5) Stop obsessing about your outcome, refocus and obsess on the feeling that outcome was going to bring you

So, next time you find yourself stuck in a state of suffering make a stand to own your life. Ask yourself what it was you were hoping for. Get conscious about how you wanted this to turn out. And then, when you have that outcome clear in your mind, take a new step, ask yourself the big question, “How did I want to feel ? “

Now, take those feelings and bring them into this moment, right here and now! Visualise yourself with the outcome you wanted until it is so clear that you are living those feelings. You can stop there if you want or you can take it that step further and make a conscious decision to create those feelings regardless of the outcome.

Make a list of things you can start doing, stop thinking, start thinking, start saying that will allow that feeling to exist right here and now. And instead of obsessing about that outcome, start obsessing about how you want to feel.

Remember, claiming yourself and mastering your life is a new way of being that uses a whole new set of skills and skills take time to learn. They also take practice. There is also now time like now to start practicing! Why choose a life of suffering when you could choose a life of freedom and mastery ?