Living with Dare – Questions for Creation
Living with Dare is something that has evolved over the last decade. I realised that I wasn’t happy with who I was or the life I was living. It looked good, but it didn’t seem to fit! I had a world record but couldn’t seem to take that limit shattering ability into the rest of my life. The problem was that I didn’t know where my life was broken which meant I couldn’t fix it. I read and read and did courses and read some more and nowhere did anyone tell me HOW to create the change they kept on going on about. Everyone could talk about the vision, but no-one could explain how I could get there.
You Can’t Create Something New Using The Same Thinking That Created What You Have Now
It all boiled down to that one statement and of course, Einstein. I knew I was doing the same things over and over and expecting different results but I didn’t know what else to do. You don’t know what you don’t know and if I knew a different way I would do that. If the books and courses couldn’t show me how to create what I wanted I would have to work it out myself – just like in diving.
Shift Your Focus From Things To Emotions
My first breakthrough in this process was to realise that I was focused on things. Here I was, 30 something, with a world record, a nice house in a nice area, a good job, a nice car, all the things I was supposed to have but I was miserable. How on earth could I still be miserable ? Even more depressing, if a world record couldn’t create the change I wanted what would ?
“If a world record couldn’t create the change I wanted what would ?”
There really isn’t much that can top a world record. Pretty much every other achievement (even in the world of corporate) falls flat. So now what ? I had spent my entire life chasing achievements and things and it hadn’t really made much of a difference. Each time I reached a goal I just moved onto the next, grander one. Only now there wasn’t a grander one. What is grander than a world record ?
That was when I was asked one simple question that has become the centre point of pretty much everything I do, “How do you want to feel ?”
No-one had ever asked me that before. Feelings were just things that came with being me. I didn’t control them or choose them, they just were. Or were they ?
“What do you want to feel ?”
That one question opened my eyes to the power of questions. Until I was asked that I had no clue there was another possibility. But when I started to live with that question all sorts of options started to present themselves.
I became hooked on questions.
Questions Create Options
Questions challenge what you think is true. This isn’t a bad thing. You either end up with confidence that it is true for you or you find that what you have always believed is in fact a limit, something that can change. It is only when you start to question that you start to wonder and explore the possibilities.
“If you can’t see it you can’t create it!”
How many times do you question yourself or what you think and why you think it ? Questions create Awareness. It is that simple.
How To Use Questions
You are looking for something that doesn’t have a definitive answer, something open ended.
- What would open up for me if I …. ?
- What would I have to let go of …. ?
- What would I start doing if I ….. ?
- If I were already living this, what would I be doing, saying, thinking and feeling ?
- How could I create this …… today ?
- What would it take to create….. ?
You will find that your question will evolve as you think about it. But you do need to think about it. It needs to be present in your day. Remind yourself to take 5 min every hour just to let that question flow through your thoughts and then pay attention to the answers. You will find that the answers change as you spend more time and start to let go of needing a precise definitive answer.
- Don’t create questions with simple yes or no answers……make them open ended
- Don’t give up! Keep the question alive, focus on it every hour (or more if you can).
- Keep on asking the question even when you think you are out of answers
- Practice letting go of your preconceptions, give yourself permission to be free of all your normal constraints. No-one can hear you or judge you, this is all in your head.
- Find 15 minutes to just let the question rattle around your mind…switch of the radio on the way home and instead listen to your question
- Subscribe to the Weekly Question
Dare to question where you are, who you are and what you want !
Dare to claim your life and actively start creating it
Dare to live a life you love
Live with Dare!